Which COMPANIES have the most useless slogans?

[Clint]

Another thing that is a bit misleading is next time your other half drags you round department stores looking at clothes...look at the labels..women's stuff,whether is size 6 or 22 has the same size model on the picture...men's stuff has the same buff chap..I think they should have the size modelling the item.
No wonder I look a bit fat in my undies...

 

[Obadiah Boondoggle]

I'm after company slogans

Real ale was a slogan against keg beer and that stuff delivered by road tanker. Camra did us all a big favour back then.

Agree entirely

However the latest marketing guff is "Craft Ale" - what is craft ale? - I guess if you call your beer that you can charge double the price

20 years ago you could go into a pub and ask for a pint of bitter - if you asked for that now you would get a strange look

However if you asked for a pint of "premium golden ale" you would get served - same recipe just a different marketing message

 

[kelper]

Craft ale is expensive, over-hopped, gassy beer in a small tin. It will have a silly name and a 'logo'. It will be 'woke' or green.

 

[Clint]

What does "woke" mean?

 

[kelper]

Right on.

 

[Clint]

What? Like those hippies used to say..? "Right on man!"

 

[Banbeer]

No wonder I look a bit fat in my undies...

Don't be so hard on yourself Clint......you'd probably look fat in anyones undies.

 

[kelper]

You are 'woke' if you support the idea that all people are equal and deserve to be treated properly and you think we are knackering our planet. It's a derogatory term from illiberal types.

 

[Clint]

I recon you're not far wrong there...
(that's your porter off the post list...)

 

[Clint]

You are 'woke' if you support the idea that all people are equal and deserve to be treated properly and you think we are knackering our planet. It's a derogatory term from illiberal types.

Ah,right o'...

 

[foxy]

I did all my own advertising, the one that most punters fall for is '2 years interest free' I did offer the 1 year interest free deal but always explaining to the punters that there was 9% loading in the price so I could take that off, plus take off an extra 5% for cash. I was that finance company's worst customer.
I ran one ad using competitors slogans.
Free linen!
40% off!
Interest free finance!
A few others I don't recall but ended the ad.
All pigs fed and ready to fly!

And punters still came in looking for deals.

 

[Banbeer]

I recon you're not far wrong there...
(that's your porter off the post list...)

Bugger

 

[Obadiah Boondoggle]

You are 'woke' if you support the idea that all people are equal and deserve to be treated properly and you think we are knackering our planet. It's a derogatory term from illiberal types.

People are not equal - and it's a good thing that they are not

Equality means that people deserve equality of opportunity - whatever their background

 

[marshbrewer]

Volvo - 'for life' is that a warranty promise? of course not!

That's an interesting one that is. The slogan comes from Volvo's recent(ish) mission statement to design out the fatalities involving Volvo cars, both driver / passengers and pedestrian, by some date - which I forget. So it makes perfect sense. But as nobody seems to know this, by definition it's obviously a rubbish slogan as it doesn't get the brand's ethos across. There's a whole first year marketing degree essay right there!

God I'm boring.

 

[Clint]

Funny...Nissan's logo is "something or other...for life"..

 

[dad_of_jon]

I'm after company slogans

Real ale was a slogan against keg beer and that stuff delivered by road tanker. Camra did us all a big favour back then.

I am aware of the origin of 'Real ale' but see the term used unscrupulously by pubs that serve nowt but bean counter controlled crap, like the word 'craft' its been hijacked and when I see either term the anti-marketing/advertising side of my brain filters it out. I've found the best ales / pubs don't feel the need to mention they are 'real'.

 

[Clint]

I absolutely can't stand the word "your" put in when a company describes itself as belonging to "you"..
In that case I'll have a trolley of your best stuff and 20 crates of "real,craft ale"...delivered!
Chop!Chop!

 

[uDicko]

"I'm lovin it"

 

[Clint Eastwood]

Have you noticed how many companies have taglines, mottos or slogans which mean nothing? Many don't even constitute a proper sentence. They promise nothing.

Lloyds Bank - 'by your side' really annoys me.
Boots - 'let's feel good' is that aimed at the customers or the shareholders?
Volvo - 'for life' is that a warranty promise? of course not!

got any more?

The song on the LLoyds bank advert is quite a slap in the face. I've changed the words to help them out & the family now sing it out loud.
"No matter what you're going through, We will rob you".

 

[Clint Eastwood]

Not truly on topic but here was a scaffolding company in Yorkshire called "Quality erections" they eventually folded due to lack of interest.
That was even too much for your average wolf whistling builder to use. Maybe they had problems in that area & felt intimidated. Lol.