Inoffensive stuff...

[MyQul]

Clint.

I'm offended on behalf of gravitationally challenged!!


Aamcle

Does that mean your high?

 

[MyQul]

You great big soppy fool..

Well, you did ask

 

[GerritT]

Does that mean your high?

What's wrong with his high?

 

[hop-a-long]

Puppies & kittens

My local has a sign outside saying:
"Unattended children will be given Red Bull and a free kitten!"

 

[DavidDetroit]

walking/assisting an elderly lady or a blind person across a busy intersection.

 

[DavidDetroit]

Rescuing someone from a burning building.

 

[LesTom]

 

[Gunge]

walking/assisting an elderly lady or a blind person across a busy intersection.

I once happened upon this guy in a wheelchair at the side of an extremely busy road. Everyone seemed unaware of him but I figured he wanted help getting across. Being the softie that most folk assume I'm not, I grabbed the chair handles and waited for a gap in the traffic then went for it. Straight away he went off on this Tourettes-style tirade so he left him high and dry smack in the middle of the road with traffic on each side... I ain't standing for any of that nonsense.

 

[Bigcol49]

Raindrops on roses
And whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Hi!
Waiting for parcels and telephone help lines,
Tailgating drivers and spelling on shop signs,
D*ckheads and a**eholes and wa**ers and sh*ts,
These are the things that get right on my t*ts.

Sorry if I've offended anyone . . . not really!

 

[Pavros]

Kittens.....everyone likes kittens....awwwww......just look at them!!!!!

 

[Pavros]

Oh! and ****ies!!!!!

 

[Gunge]

Kittens.....everyone likes kittens....awwwww......just look at them!!!!!

Yes! I'd like to cover myself in tuna juice then lay naked in a bathful of kittens. We've got four incredible ( as they all are ) cats but that's not enough. You can never get enough ***** - that's what I always say.

 

[Cwrw666]

There's nothing offensive in Scunthorpe.

 

[Bigcol49]

There's nothing offensive in Scunthorpe.

. . . or Penistone

 

[braziliain]

My local has a sign outside saying:
"Unattended children will be given Red Bull and a free kitten!"

Hairdresser in the village has a sign in the window saying

"Unattended children will be given mullets"

 

[Chippy_Tea]

Hairdresser in the village has a sign in the window saying

"Unattended children will be given mullets"

Glad that wasn't Mallets!

.

 

[SmallSpacesBrewing]

Getting slapped with a salmon.

Hahaha. Me and my brother had an idea for a TV show about 5 years ago that was just that! We called it fish in the face and was just about running up to strangers slapping them with a salmon while one of us was filming. The other one running of course!

 

[Ghillie]

Hahaha. Me and my brother had an idea for a TV show about 5 years ago that was just that! We called it fish in the face and was just about running up to strangers slapping them with a salmon while one of us was filming. The other one running of course!

Haha yes! It's never too late pal, I think you should still chase that dream.

 

[MyQul]

My local has a sign outside saying:
"Unattended children will be given Red Bull and a free kitten!"

That's not going to go wrong, is it

 

[MyQul]

Hi!
Waiting for parcels and telephone help lines,
Tailgating drivers and spelling on shop signs,
D*ckheads and a**eholes and wa**ers and sh*ts,
These are the things that get right on my t*ts.

Sorry if I've offended anyone . . . not really!

Strangely enough I dont remember that in the sound of music