A tragic tale!

[Dutto]

Last week, a nine-year old child committed suicide.

Apparently, he had declared to the world that he was Gay and he had suffered so much bullying at his school that he decided to end it all by taking his own life.

Here's the article as put forward by Fox News ...

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/08/2...coming-out-gay-bullied-by-classmates-mom.html

For me, the situation raises the question:

"How the hell can a nine-year old child know his own sexuality?"

and

"Why is a nine-year old child allowed to declare it to his parents without challenge or explanation?"

The child's mother blames the mothers of the bullies for her son's suicide, on the basis that they should be held responsible for the actions of their children!

Poor little bugger!

 

[Bigcol49]

Hi!
When the new kids started Y7 in secondary school, I could spot the "victims" in minutes. It's really sad.

 

[Chippy_Tea]

They were the ones that were always picked last in PE when it was a team game.

 

[GerritT]

"And he goes, 'Can I be honest with you?'" [the mother] said. "And I was like, 'Sure,' and he’s like, 'I know you buy me boy stuff because I’m a boy, but I’d rather dress like a girl.'"

That's.. not what gay means or implies.

 

[Clint]

Someone will always be last. I've told my boys as long as they do their best the rest doesn't matter as not everyone can be brilliant at everything. They have taken this on board .They are also one belt off black in their MMA class...this I recommend as they can look after themselves,get learned how to deal with situations and builds loads of confidence,respect and self control plus strength and fitness.
If you have a child who is maybe a little unsure or shy get them in a similar club...they'll love it!

 

[Dutto]

Hi!
When the new kids started Y7 in secondary school, I could spot the "victims" in minutes. It's really sad.

Unfortunately, it goes on into adulthood!

You couldn't have met a nicer Lab Tech than one I worked back in the 60's but one Monday morning he arrived for work with his face virtually held together with sticking plaster and stitches. Apparently some numb-nuts had shouted from across Freeman Street in Grimsby "Why are you looking at my bird?"; and then crossed the street to attack him!

These people always pick on the weaker ones!

I hope the girl who accompanied the attacker was impressed with the manly display af strength and aggression ...

... and I also hope she was there when he picked on the one that gave him a good hiding,

 

[Bevvied]

If someone looked at my bird, I'd be chuffed.
I'd wonder where he'd lost his guide dog, but I'd be chuffed.

 

[Chippy_Tea]

I hope for your sake she doesn't read that

 

[Oneiroi]

"How the hell can a nine-year old child know his own sexuality?"

According to this paper (or at least the studies it quotes) that's about the average age for children to experience same-sex attraction for the first time:

"As these studies have shown, first same-sex attraction for males and females typically occurs at the mean age of 9.6 for boys (Herdt and Boxer, 1993), and between the ages of 10 and 10.5 for girls (Hamer et al., 1993; Pattutuci and Hamer, 1995). It is significant to note that within the range of these samples, males and females, heterosexuals and homosexuals, all experienced sexual attraction at or near the age of 10, with male sexual subjectivity a bit ahead of female sexual subjectivity."
https://www.ipce.info/sites/ipce.in...hments/herdt_-_the_magical_age_of_10_2000.pdf

 

[Dutto]

According to this paper (or at least the studies it quotes) that's about the average age for children to experience same-sex attraction for the first time......

I agree.

It's what we used to call "Hero Worship" and it happens to all of us when we are young. At nine years old I hero-worshipped Johnny Weissmuller (Tarzan of the time) and Keith Bingley (the kid next door who was two years older than me); and I was totally indifferent to girls.

However, at that age my lack of interest in the female of the species didn't mean that I was "Gay" so I reiterate ...

"How the hell can a nine-year old child know his own sexuality?"

... and the answer must be "He or she doesn't know." with the operative word being "know".

BTW:

• I still visit Keith Bingley. He married my first ever girlfriend and as far as I am aware neither if us are Gay!
• My hero-worship of Johnny Weissmuller resulted in me equalling his world record time of 59 seconds for the 100 metre freestyle at swimming. Unfortunately for me, the world record had dropped to 53.4 seconds by that time (1964) so I was over 40 years too late!

 

[Oneiroi]

It's definitely a bit of a fuzzy subject, but the article is talking specifically about sexual attraction in gay people, rather than just admiring someone. The next paragraph also contains: "typically, the age of first homoerotic fantasy was 11.2 for males and 11.9 for females."

I do take your point on 'knowing' in general. There is a big difference between having some degree of occasional feelings and 'knowing' confidently what your sexuality is. But... It doesn't seem unreasonable to me that a 9 year old, who say has erotic fantasies about other boys and experiences no attraction at all to girls, could claim to know that he was gay. I'm not saying everyone, or most or even many, people know their sexuality at that age, just that it seems plausible that some people do.

My hero-worship of Johnny Weissmuller resulted in me equalling his world record time of 59 seconds for the 100 metre freestyle at swimming. Unfortunately for me, the world record had dropped to 53.4 seconds by that time (1964) so I was over 40 years too late!

Isn't that always the way. Still a damn impressive time.

 

[Clint]

My leather thong comment is substantiated...you walked right into that one!

 

[Dutto]

..........

Isn't that always the way. Still a damn impressive time.

Thank you! I still wonder who the fat old guy is who looks at me in the bathroom mirror every morning though!

One reason I just can't understand the nine-year old "knowing" his sexuality is that a close family friend actually asked my Mum "Do you think I'm effeminate?" when he was about eighteen years old and his girlfriend had just jilted him.

My Mum asked him why and discovered that not only had his girlfriend jilted him, he had been bothered by men trying to pick him up from his place of work in a local shop. My Mum never shirked anything so she just went ahead and told him, "Yes, I think you have effeminate tendencies." and went on to explain why she thought that way.

TBH, I think it was a relief all round when he accepted the situation a couple of years later (when he was about 20 years old), but I still think that he was probably the last person amongst his friends and relatives to discover that he was gay.