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- Aug 12, 2015
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The NHS night of torture.
Why do nurses like asking for your name and DOB every time they see you? After countless encounters I finally started to get sleepy at 22. I managed to shut all the curtains to block all the lights out, obtain an extra blanket to fight the cold and move my bed from under the air conditioning. By 22.30 I was soundly asleep. The bliss didn't last long. At midnight a male nurse came in 'Hello Leon, sorry for waking you. How are you?' 'Well I was just about to score the winning try for the Scarlets in the European Cup Final, but I think we now may have lost'. I don't think my wit was received well. 'Ok. I am here to take a blood sample and give you an injection in your stomach'. Out come the needle, but before he starts he asks, 'what is your name and DOB?' 'Leon ..........'. I thought I was the one half asleep, but it seemed the nurse may have just woke up. After prodding and poking the needle in and out of two veins he concedes that he needs a bigger needle. Off he went and came back with a bigger needle. 'Don't look Leon, small scratch, but first confirm your name and DOB'. Now when someone says that you can't help but look. Luckily a vein further up my arm produced enough blood. Then came the needle in the stomach. Again, he gets the needle out, says don't look, pinches the tiny amount of fat on my stomach and asks ' can you confirm your name and DOB?' 'Donald Trump, now stick that thing in me and let me go back to sleep'. I slowly drift back off, listening to all the machines speaking to each other as they constantly beep. I am not sure if it's the machines that finally get me off or the duet of farts and snoring from the two men next to me. Just as I was returning to my try scoring exploits my curtain opens again, this time the senior clinical nurse. 'Sorry Leon, the blood we took earlier clotted before we could test it, we need some more'. 'Ok but before you start, I won't look and my name is Leon ......' this time my forearm produces blood first time. I am glad because I am starting to look like a junkie. Eyes closed, I may get back off to sleep. Nope, 'hi Leon, we need to take your blood pressure etc at 2am, it's 1.30 now, do you want us to take it now or come back later?. Hmmm whilst I think about that you better have my name and DOB, it's Leon ..... sleep better 1.30 and 6am came pretty easy, that's until the curtain opened to the sound of yet another nurse. 'Good morning Leon how did you sleep?' ' give me another hour and I will let you know'. No such chance more blood pressure checks and another confirmation of what my name was. Just as she was leaving she give me the good news that I could now go back to sleep and breakfast will be at 7.30. 'That's great, thanks nurse, do me a favour, let them know my name is Leon and my DOB IS ......
Why do nurses like asking for your name and DOB every time they see you? After countless encounters I finally started to get sleepy at 22. I managed to shut all the curtains to block all the lights out, obtain an extra blanket to fight the cold and move my bed from under the air conditioning. By 22.30 I was soundly asleep. The bliss didn't last long. At midnight a male nurse came in 'Hello Leon, sorry for waking you. How are you?' 'Well I was just about to score the winning try for the Scarlets in the European Cup Final, but I think we now may have lost'. I don't think my wit was received well. 'Ok. I am here to take a blood sample and give you an injection in your stomach'. Out come the needle, but before he starts he asks, 'what is your name and DOB?' 'Leon ..........'. I thought I was the one half asleep, but it seemed the nurse may have just woke up. After prodding and poking the needle in and out of two veins he concedes that he needs a bigger needle. Off he went and came back with a bigger needle. 'Don't look Leon, small scratch, but first confirm your name and DOB'. Now when someone says that you can't help but look. Luckily a vein further up my arm produced enough blood. Then came the needle in the stomach. Again, he gets the needle out, says don't look, pinches the tiny amount of fat on my stomach and asks ' can you confirm your name and DOB?' 'Donald Trump, now stick that thing in me and let me go back to sleep'. I slowly drift back off, listening to all the machines speaking to each other as they constantly beep. I am not sure if it's the machines that finally get me off or the duet of farts and snoring from the two men next to me. Just as I was returning to my try scoring exploits my curtain opens again, this time the senior clinical nurse. 'Sorry Leon, the blood we took earlier clotted before we could test it, we need some more'. 'Ok but before you start, I won't look and my name is Leon ......' this time my forearm produces blood first time. I am glad because I am starting to look like a junkie. Eyes closed, I may get back off to sleep. Nope, 'hi Leon, we need to take your blood pressure etc at 2am, it's 1.30 now, do you want us to take it now or come back later?. Hmmm whilst I think about that you better have my name and DOB, it's Leon ..... sleep better 1.30 and 6am came pretty easy, that's until the curtain opened to the sound of yet another nurse. 'Good morning Leon how did you sleep?' ' give me another hour and I will let you know'. No such chance more blood pressure checks and another confirmation of what my name was. Just as she was leaving she give me the good news that I could now go back to sleep and breakfast will be at 7.30. 'That's great, thanks nurse, do me a favour, let them know my name is Leon and my DOB IS ......
