Priceless

[Chippy_Tea]

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan .. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!
I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with crap in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].
After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful!
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ..... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).
;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi!
Alex

 

[Cononthebarber]

Well done if its real, I agree with the lot apart from the damaging of someone else's car. Its a bit hypocritical to try and teach someone a lesson for a potential crime by then committing vandalism yourself...doesn't really make sense in my head but there you go, that’s people for you!

 

[Chippy_Tea]

I imagine its either exaggerated or not true, would you risk going to prison for vandalising a car when you had already set him up in all the other ways?

 

[bobsbeer]

Quite a good tale. I could imagine it happening, but that's just in the movies. :lol:

 

[Chippy_Tea]

Quite a good tale. I could imagine it happening, but that's just in the movies. :lol:

A bit like the crocodile dundee film where he pulls out the machete and says to the mugger "call that a knife"

 

[oldjiver]

This is what our American cousins imagine could happen, and thats why they buy guns. In reality they usually manage to shoot themselves or someone else in the family. Has anyone seen the TV programme "American Guns". Like kids with toys. I was a soldier so I know what guns can do.
( I seem to remember seeing somewhere that for every 1 burglar shot in America, 3000 people shot themselves)

 

[Tim_Crowhurst]

I seem to remember seeing somewhere that for every 1 burglar shot in America, 3000 people shot themselves

In states with low numbers of guns, suicide rates tend to be low. In states with high numbers of guns, suicide rates tend to be several times higher. Wyoming has five times as many guns (compared to population) as New Jersey, and a suicide rate almost three times as high.

 

[Dronfieldbrewer]

A mugger had a go at me once...demanded my laptop bag

Pulled a knife...nuff said...

 

[Fil]

And Americans dont understand why the rest of the world considers em bullys???????

 

[oldjiver]

And Americans dont understand why the rest of the world considers em bullys???????

But on a personal level they are so bloody NICE. All the ones I have met have been polite, generous, good fun, and totally unable to understand why everybody misunderstands them for trying to rule the world :hmm:

 

[Tim_Crowhurst]

And Americans dont understand why the rest of the world considers em bullys???????

IMO far too many Americans either take no interest whatsoever in international attitudes towards them, or naively think that terrorism is an effective tactic for forcing your enemies to do what you want. It doesn't work: terror-based warfare of any kind tends to breed an increasingly fanatical hatred of the group the terrorists claim to represent, in some cases making your enemy far more dangerous than they were previously.

When the Luftwaffe carpet-bombed Coventry in 1940, killing around 550 people, their intention was to create so much fear amongst the British public that the British government would sue for peace. It didn't work: British resolve to defeat the Nazis actually hardened, ensuring that the only way the Nazis could win was to invade and defeat Britain, something which has happened only a handful of times in British history (the five dates I know of are 43, 865, 1016, 1066 and 1688 AD). To make matters worse for the Nazis, public opposition to using similar tactics against them was eliminated, and the RAF (and later USAAF) area-bombing campaign that began just weeks later resulted in the deaths of over half a million German civilians by the end of the war - around a thousand for every person killed at Coventry.

 

[Chippy_Tea]

When the Luftwaffe carpet-bombed Coventry in 1940, killing around 550 people, their intention was to create so much fear amongst the British public that the British government would sue for peace. It didn't work: British resolve to defeat the Nazis actually hardened, ensuring that the only way the Nazis could win was to invade and defeat Britain, something which has happened only a handful of times in British history (the five dates I know of are 43, 865, 1016, 1066 and 1688 AD). To make matters worse for the Nazis, public opposition to using similar tactics against them was eliminated, and the RAF (and later USAAF) area-bombing campaign that began just weeks later resulted in the deaths of over half a million German civilians by the end of the war - around a thousand for every person killed at Coventry.

Interesting read Tim. :thumb: