Am I missing something?

[Bitter_Dave]

5.Lack of that Hoppy taste. I followed instruction BUT didn't realise that the Hops flavour vanishes if left in too long. The instruction say 5 days but on here people say 3. In my case , and because my brewing temp was about 21, I had to leave it longer, so my hops were in about 7 days. I'm literally waiting for the local brew shop open and I'm off to buy some more.
I do think the hops in the kits are just enough to give a base..... more need for a hoppy taste.

If you want a beer that tastes like a US IPA the Muntons Gold one probably isn't the one to go for. I've not made it, but it is based on a traditional UK IPA recipe but made at a weaker ABV level. UK IPAs do not have the intense citrus flavour of US IPAs which have become the norm in pubs etc these days. Added to which, if you serve it in a pressure barrel it is only going to have real ale levels of carbonation. I'm not surprised it tastes something like a bitter. That would probably suit me, but if you like Brew Dog IPA (which is not my cup of tea) you need to get a kit with loads of hop pellets in them.

 

[peebee]

... @peebee this sounds like one for the defuddler.

Ha ... a job for the Defuddler? Thanks

...

No? ... It isn't!

The Defuddler is a pre-conditioner to preparing water for Mashing!

For extract brewing, near enough anything you'd happily drink as water will do. Get rid of excess chlorine (as has been described). Too much "chalk" might make light beer a bit dull tasting, but not that many could tell. Water makes for an excellent scapegoat, but rarely deals with significant problems away from the mash (and even then, is responsible for far fewer issues than it's blamed for).

Your water is rated as Hard

Good! Nowt wrong with that; often it's essential. It's when it's mixed up with high alkalinity you might have problems making beer ("chalk" to many) ... but any significant problems will be with mashing.

Now, if you really want to wind me up ... mention water hardness again.

 

[Dark Arts]

My first brews were a bit meh, then from talk to people on this forum and my own googling etc i came to the following,

Clean/sanitize everything(don't need to go ott)

Stick a Camden tablet in or harris pure brew

Get some sort of temp control(even if that's in a corner of a room) temp was 1 of my issues, a hack for this would be swapping out the yeast with a higher temp range, think us-05 will work upto 27° before it throws a ester fit

And lastly have a look at you water, rule of thumb is if it's good to drink it's good to brew, but if in doubt use bottled to rule it out?

You'll get there, before long you'll be pimping kits with dry hops n mini mashed

 

[Hazelwood Brewery]

I doubt this is anything to do with water or even temperature control - though managing both will improve beer IF you have a good palate.

We are all more or less sensitive to flavours and if you’re someone with a less sensitive palate you may find beer kits of the same style are not very distinctive. Real ale, IPA, and India Pale Ale are very likely all the same style.

You could try brewing different styles such as a bitter, an American IPA, and a Belgian beer. The other option is to start modifying the kits with additional hops you bought separately - try dry hopping with Mosaic or Cascade.

 

[MashBag]

I did wonder about perception/tastebuds, when I read "homebrew is just variations of alcoholic brown water"