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"I like my whisky and women the same way, 12 years old and full of coke", said no one, every, not even allegedly, Your Honour .

To be honest I was surprised ours wasn't on the list. B&M and Home Bargains have opened in town recently and the store is poorly sited - no free parking nearby. I doubt ours will let much longer.

Prune wine? That'll give you a run for your money!

The mark a true English Gentleman. It's not about whether you win or lose, but how you play the game. I was good at some sports (cricket, shooting) not bad at some others (golf, squash, rugby) and absolutely dire at many (football and others) but I never did anything than my try best at...

I think it's cultural thing. For the English, sport (or to be more exact, games -'sports' are traditionally hunting, shooting and fishing) are pastimes. Look at the culture of the amateur. Cricket was half and half until the 60s. Rugby Union was amateur (and some might say better) until the...

I have one of his books, it is very good though his recipes tend to be for 4 so need scaling down. His Balti is especially yummy.

Some parts of the country have 'Op Snap' for submitting dash cam footage of traffic offences. I've submitted several. Two for dangerous overtaking across solid white lines and one for an illegal right turn have resulted in penalties being issued (you get an email saying it has been sent)...

Excellent

I wasn't bad in my mis-spent youth. Still like a throw when I can find a board.

I spotted my next career move - Tesco re recruiting deliver drivers. When I hang up my pointy hat (which no one ever wears) I fancy a couple of days a week on the vans.

A coupe of my Courage Best. Not half bad even if the second one did suffer a 'pouring malfunction'. I'll shove a flake in it and call it a 99.

Home made port, sounds delicious but one must ask...What could possibly go wrong?😜 My wife may have forgotten many things, but me throwing up in the kitchen sink and down the curtains after too much port and whisky after a Sergeants' Mess Burns Night in Cyprus is not one of them. The red stain...

Every time I see that picture I remember my Sergeant Major saying GET YER BLOODY 'AIR CUT!!

Sometimes just giving it a mild stir gets things going again. Thankfully I have a brew fridge so temperature fluctuations are not a problem. The garage being full of building stuff for the extension, now that IS a problem but they've nearly finished so back to brewing soon.

Not only is it my favourite album of all time, it contains my favourite single of all time Hangin' on the Telephone AND it has a picture of Debbie Harry on it. The things Debbie did to my early teenage psyche...

The recipes I use come from this chap - this is his new book which just about covers the Volumes 1 & 2 I have. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Curry-Compendium-Misty-Ricardos-Kitchen/dp/1999660838/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=curry+compendium&qid=1638568731&sr=8-1 He also has an excellent YouTube feed -...

I pretty much go with 14 days as standard now.

My colleagues in the Rural Crime Unit will be after me!

I'm doing a garlic chilli lamb tomorrow and I'll be marauding the lamb tonight. Similar sort of thing, garlic, tamarind and vinegar.

None - it's just pi$$ed down all night and most of the day. We get snow about once every ten years being on the bit of the country that picks up the edge of the Gulf Stream. It just never gets cold enough (or dry enough) to snow.